As I turned to take a seat on the examination table, I could see his reflection in the mirror over the sink as he stared lustily at my ass and legs. I flushed, and I could feel myself moistening. Just that one look from him would have been enough to satisfy me. Then he handed me the paper gown and said, “Rita [his nurse] had to leave early on personal business. If you like, we can postpone the examination…” “Oh, no. That’s okay – I took time off work to be here, and I’d rather get it all over. It was all my fault that the planet suffered. Sometimes the guilt pressed down on me. If I hadn't killed Lilith, none of this would have happened. But I just couldn't let Mary die. I was too selfish, too much of a coward to face life without her. I knew, deep down inside me, if I had to make that same choice again, I would. Even knowing just how terrible the consequences would be.Despite my guilt, exhausted sleep found me quickly. I drifted down into slumbering unconsciousness. Drifting through. You will see.’ ‘I need to write Mother and tell her where I am.’ ‘I did that for you, son. You can write again when you feel up to it.’ Richard watched John’s face as he spoke. When John grew silent, his face showed a faraway look and then deep sadness came over him. John left the room, without saying another word. * * * * ‘Now take another step and stop. Your face is white. If you fall I will have to watch you go down the stairs. So, before that happens sit down.’ Marie was helping Richard. The second reason, which was no doubt driven by some guilt on my part, was that my husband obviously wanted to be part of what I do in my fantasy life when I'm flying. And when I thought about it, I realized that it even might be good for our relationship. So I really should not have been all that surprised when he suggested that I act out my fantasy closer to home.But the machine shop party didn't go exactly as I had imagined it would in that it involved, for me, a first time bondage.
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